Book Nerd

Hello again.

So today this happened.

I go into my kids' rooms as little as possible. I tell people that it is because I want them to have "their own space," but mostly it is because their rooms are unbelievably messy and it makes me simultaneously terrified (of stepping on legos), infuriated (I just redressed all those naked baby dolls in their original outfits yesterday!), depressed (I just redressed all those naked baby dolls in their original outfits yesterday!), and guilty (a better mom would make her kids clean up after themselves). There is generally a walkway from the door to the bed and to the closet, and every other inch of floor space is covered with toys and books and dress up clothes.

Tonight, when I went to put Molly to bed and read her story, I discovered this little collection of books stacked next to her bed. There isn't a clear path to the bookshelf, so I guess she decided to just bring the bookshelf to her. She's got to get prepared for her extensive night time reading, you see. You can never be too close to your books.

I too have my own untidy tower of books next to my bed; books I am reading right now, books I finished months ago, books I just bought, books I'm intending to read eventually. Even books I'm never going to read. There are piles of books in pretty much every room around here, even the kitchen and bathroom. To me, no room feels right without some books in it. If you can force your children to become readers simply by surrounding them with books, mine don't stand a chance. 

Really, I know there is nothing really extraordinary about loving to read. Billions of people have loved to read as much as I do. But at the same time, it feels extraordinary to me. Of all the things I am, being a reader is probably the most fundamental and important characteristic. So much of my personality is shaped by my indefatigable love of books, by what I've read at certain times of my life, but my ceaseless ability to escape into the pages. I am who I am because of books, and if books are the only part of me that gets passed down to my children, I'll be a happy mom.

So, seeing my sweet little goose with her stack of books, it feels like maybe I am doing something right with this whole parenting business after all. Maybe I don't have to feel guilty about having my nose in a book always, maybe I am just demonstrating one of my favorite things about myself. And maybe soon enough, I'll get to share my favorite books too.